Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make
your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many
things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and
instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be
stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today
we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we
will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:
1. Give up your need to always be right
There
are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to
always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or
causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s
just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a
fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question:
“Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?
2. Give up your need for control
Be
willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens
to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they
are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street –
just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they
are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.
“By
letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go.
But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu
3. Give up on blame
Give
up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for
what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start
taking responsibility for your life.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk
Oh
my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative,
polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything
that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and
self-defeating. You are better than that.
“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle
5. Give up your limiting beliefs
about
what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From
now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep
you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!
“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle
6. Give up complaining
Give
up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things
– people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed.
Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable
unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those
feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate
the power of positive thinking.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism
Give
up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different
than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to
be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be
understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.
8. Give up your need to impress others
Stop
trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like
you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be
something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the
moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be
drawn to you, effortlessly.
9. Give up your resistance to change
Change
is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you
make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you.
Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell
10. Give up labels
Stop
labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as
being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little.
Minds only work when open.
“The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer
11. Give up on your fears
Fear
is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your
mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
12. Give up your excuses
Send
them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot
of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead
of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get
stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that
99.9% of the time are not even real.
13. Give up the past
I
know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better
than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to
take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have
and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past
that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was
present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and
enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear
vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the
now.
14. Give up attachment
This
is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell
you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something
impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The
moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you
give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to
do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while
love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love
there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot
coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene.
You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things
without even trying. A state beyond words.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations
Way
too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live
their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live
their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to
what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government
and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice,
that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with
living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over
their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what
they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one
life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially
don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
I'm sure if you spent some time looking up golf tips, you would find several people talking about Practicing with Purpose. I think "practice with purpose" is probably the single most important thing to remember when trying to learn anything new. I apply this to everything in my life; from being a father, student, golfer, to less important things like cooking or video games. If you aren't doing something for the sake of improving yourself then you're just waiting for the activity to finish without it serving a purpose. In other words, you're allowing a unique opportunity to disappear forever.
Salman, Jason, and I played Timberview in Ft. Worth yesterday. Shot my lowest score to date despite the course sucking.
It was truly unfortunate that we couldn't finish the round. Salman was on pace to shoot a great score. He shot a six over forty-two on the front nine after a birdie and his first eagle! The shot was right out of a PGA highlight reel. It was roughly a one hundred yard approach shot, his ball hits a hill off the green and trickles down towards the flag and finds the bottom of the cup. Great shot Salman!
The Course Layout: I really enjoyed our round today. The layouts of the holes for the Red and White courses were fairly challenging without being too crazy except for the Bermuda Triangle. There aren't any bunkers to worry about but several fairways were too narrow for driver so I had to use my three wood off the tee to keep it under control and in the fairway. The par 3s on this course are definitely the signature holes. Yes, all the par 3s. To be honest the par 5s and 4s were nice, but also pretty generic. The par 3s all required clearing water. Not only that, the par 3s were deceivingly windy around the pin today. On one par 3 Salman and I didn't feel a breeze in the tee box but the flag was almost sideways. The pin was about 145 yards away and the edge of the water right around 130 from the tee. My eight iron is my 140 club. The winds were so strong that I splashed into the water even after clubbing up to a six iron! It was a really cool challenge to try and hit it low while still making sure to stay on the green. Needless to say, the par 3s were by far the worst holes for me scoring-wise. 
Funny story, Salman shot his all-time low of 93 and the guy did not stop complaining about how poorly he was playing; starting at the first tee all the way to the 18th hole where he ended the day with "You played amazing, dude. I just hope I shot under a 110. Today was freaking horrible." I never keep track of my cumulative score during the round because I don't want to get discouraged or overconfident, but I think next time I'm going to add up Salman's scores for him at the turn so he can properly criticize how he's playing.
The tour players I teach all set up to the ball differently, but they have one thing in common: They feel the ground under their feet. They get into a position where their legs are like shock absorbers (left), and they're poised to push off the ground to create force. Take off your shoes and make some swings to get a feel for this. Pay attention to your footing as you swing. Unless you're properly grounded, it's tough to control a swing with any power.
What a day! Phong, Salman, & I played Tangle Ridge today. It's a beautiful and challenging course. Theme for the day seemed to be hitting Juno with golf balls. 
Elite players transfer their weight toward the front of the left foot as they start the downswing and into the left heel at impact. This allows them to deliver the clubhead squarely as they rotate around the front foot. Many amateurs slide their hips too much toward the target coming down; this inhibits their ability to rotate, leading to inconsistent strikes. By allowing your weight to move initially toward your left toes and then into the heel (left), you'll pivot around your left leg and hit with power.
The standard advice for greenside bunkers—play the ball forward in your stance and open the clubface—is correct. But most players underestimate how much of a setup change they need to make. Don't just move the ball an inch or two forward; play it even with your front heel (left). And you need to rotate the clubface significantly open at address, so that the back of the clubhead would be resting on the sand if you put it down. Get those two fundamentals right, and the club will slide through the sand instead of dig.
Just got off the phone with Vu and we were talking about ways to practice at home on carpet. I thought I'd share a little drill I try to do every day. It helps me get a feel for my swing plane and when to allow the club to release.
My goal is always to hit the carpet about half an inch closer to the right the line and that the mark it leaves is a good length too. That would be half an inch to the left of the line for right-handed players. Also, be sure to swing LIGHTLY. You don't want to take a tour-sized divot out of your carpet because divot-repair sand won't work in your living room. Hope the drill helps you!
